I’ve been thinking about how we communicate with each other, and how much of what we say when we talk to our loved ones is the usual everyday stuff and how much the things that really need to be said. You would think that the people we love, our partners, family and close friends would be the very people we would be able to bare our souls to without any hesitation but that’s not usually the reality of the human condition. It is often much easier to share from our hearts when the people we are sharing with aren’t directly related to the situation.
It’s easy to see why, we don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings especially not those of the truly important people in our lives, we don’t want to be judged or made to feel inadequate in anyway and we don’t want to show our fears and insecurities when doing so might upset the very people we would do anything to protect. All of these things seem like valid reasons for not sharing what’s in our hearts but where does that leave us.
From personal experience I know how hard it is to always feel the need to hold things in and protect others but it’s a slippery slope and can lead to feelings of resentment, frustration, anger… the list goes on. Not being free to express our deepest thoughts and feelings can have a long lasting effect on our lives and our ability to be who we truly are. We end up wearing a mask, often many masks for many different people. In trying to protect others we do them a disservice. We are, albeit subconsciously saying that we can handle this but that they can’t and therefore need to be protected by us. Thought provoking I know but worth taking a few minutes to ponder.
Our feelings need to be expressed and our truth needs to be told. We need to share from our hearts or risk physical and or emotional health issues. We need to be free to BE. This is why I decided to begin offering psychotherapy sessions as part of my work. I have been a psychotherapist for many years and within each session I offer no matter which one it maybe, psychotherapy is a huge apart of it but over the last few months it has become clear to me that the need to have someone to talk to is so very necessary to our wellbeing. Make it your mission to find someone to talk to. Seek out someone who you can share all the yucky stuff with so that you can release it and give yourself space to be you.